All about the bust

style

Inspired by easy access to the boobs, these are the outfits that are in rotation right now – as a newly-nursing mama. 

First up, ASOS; they have an amazing selection of basics, as well as nursing/maternity dresses and tops, so cute that they don’t even look like nursing specific garments.

ASOS DESIGN Maternity Nursing Cami With Clips 2 Pack SAVE
C$52.60


Zara is a treasure trove of items that aren’t nursing specific, but sure do fit the bill. 

I can’t wait to wear this in Mexico when we head off with our little one in tow. 


Zara checked dress
Draped checked blouse, riding the plaid trend from fall into winter.
Zara dress
Oversized patchwork shirt – Zara
Bird satin tunic – Zara



The basics already in your closet can also find their way into nursing-friendly outfits. 

I made a point of sectioning off my closet, moving conducive items to the front of drawers (I fold Marie Kondo style, like library books in my drawers, spine up), and in the closets I have a section just for items that ‘fit’ as nursing wear. 

The penchant for sleepleisure is perfect for moms (or anyone, really). A cool relaxed pant and pajama-style top are easy, breezy, with full front access. 
This screams chic, while maintaining the comfort needed to plunk down on the floor, change a quick diaper or feed a writing child. 
Chicnico is on to something with this mustard-hued sweater. Wear anytime, anywhere. Almost. https://www.chicnico.com/collections/cardigans/products/chicnico-stylish-open-collar-oversize-casual-solid-color-cardigan-3?lshst=collection

From a site that boasts ‘sexy but modest’ clothing… this is definitely a wear-on-repeat idea. I have a Halston Heritage-inspired vintage silk dress, handed down from my mother, that looks pleasingly similar to this one! https://www.sexymodest.com/products/brigitte-button-down-maxi-dress

More great cardigans from Lauren McBride. Versatile and cozy. https://www.laurenmcbrideblog.com/2018/08/feel-nice-with-qvc/

Rounding out the on-trend items on deck, we have a jumpsuit, onesie, or romper. I have a gorgeous crush velvet version in navy blue from Aerie/American Eagle. It’s surprisingly easy to wear and layered over a cropped t-shirt it actually functions like a nursing outfit, but also looks amazing and feels like a playsuit. Velvet is in demand this season, but has staying power since it keeps cropping up when the temperatures drop. https://www.stitchfix.com/?utm_source=pinterest&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=pinterestschedule

An easy, ‘yes.’ Who doesn’t have a patterned longline blazer or cardigan? Wear it over lingerie or a bedroom inspired tank. Double yes. https://www.chicnico.com/collections/cardigans?utm_source=zucardiganpin-3&utm_medium=zucardiganpin-3&utm_campaign=zucardiganpin-3&pp=0&epik=v%3D1%26u%3DvG1DZXtTbiXVFlycJY74k91QGpu-nsuv%26n%3DdfRx8Pk_e0HpPQERQArRtw%3D%3D

Basic, in the best possible way; buttons, waffle knit, loose and versatile. This even has snaps instead of buttons. I couldn’t ask for more. 
https://www.instagram.com/p/BnwgFpDHN6V/

What I like best about all these pieces is that many are items I already own. Others, I will be able to keep wearing them long after my little one has graduated to solids… which is, I think, a solid investment. 

Put a Ring On It – But Keep Your Mouth Shut About Other People’s Rings

Wedding

Even though I’m already married and the ‘ring search’ is far behind me, I still love looking at engagement rings and seeing what is new and exciting in that world. On a blog I was reading recently a woman posted the following:

“I see so many posts about moissanite and never realized it’s as popular as it is. I was under the impression it was a relatively new creation. I have had several people ask me if my diamond ring is “real” and I have to admit that it bothers me. Also, how do you even respond to that? Anyway, I am looking forward to reading other points of view.”

My thoughts:

I think my perspective is definitely shaped by the fact that I do not care about other people’s opinions about my ring and I also don’t have friends who would ever judge my relationship (or my financial status) based on the ring I’m wearing. When planning our wedding with my spouse we decided, deliberately, that we did not want expensive or ostentatious rings. What we did want were one of a kind, unconventional and unique rings that suited our style and our lifestyle. I work with my hands and would be nervous to wear something too precious. Not that I didn’t try on a variety of rings… but every time I tried a stunner with a gem that was raised too far from my finger, I felt like I’d get it caught on things, destroy it and every surface in my house, but mostly …like it was totally impractical.

In the end, my ring was made by a friend who is a jeweller; it’s unconventional and we used rough diamonds, so no sparkle really. No one has ever asked if they are ‘real’. However, many people have asked about the ring, the design and where they can contact the creator (Breanne Morrow at White Feather Designs).

View More: http://sweetheartempire.pass.us/alison-allia-engagement

Photo by Sweetheart Empire. Rings by White Feather Designs

View More: http://sweetheartempire.pass.us/alison-allia-engagement

Engagement photos by Kate O’Connor of Sweetheart Empire

I think what bothers me about the idea of people asking the original poster these questions is this: why are they asking? Is there some further question they need to have answered? Why do they care?

Maybe they are a gemologist? Maybe they are looking for an engagement ring. But if it’s because they want to know how costly the ring is… why? It’s none of their business and it’s super tacky that they are asking.

Perhaps they want to know because they are considering their options, or maybe see the value in a ring that doesn’t support an industry that has some problems (conflict diamonds, environmental impact), but you can probably already tell that this is their view based on the way they ask.

At the end of the day, I don’t know why it’s anyone’s business what you choose for something as personal as your wedding/engagement rings.

True Blue Baby

style

This bump fashion is going strong, considering my preference for loose, swingy clothes I’m feeling very fortunate. Today was a comfy one (thank you Fashion forecasters for keeping running shoes as an appropriate option… I could not be more grateful).

It’s still a bit crisp in the mornings, so a bright patterned bomber is perfect for the a.m. I can’t tell you how many times I get compliments on these vintage shell and rope earrings. A friend gave them to me second hand, claiming ‘they are so ugly, I have no idea how to wear them… but I honk you can pull them off.

I take that as the ultimate challenge. If someone says it’s unwearable – let me at it.

I know I’m lucky to be feeling so good right now…Even at 7:30 am when these were taken. I’m welcoming all the changes this pregnancy body is bringing. I also just got a big delivery of maternity pants in the mail. Cannot wait to integrate them and get into some pants that don’t squeeze around my middle.

Cheers, from almost-seventeen weeks,

Xo A

Four Years

Love, Wedding

I can hardly believe that four years have passed since the day I married my wife. It feels like yesterday. It feels like a lifetime ago. So much has happened.

Wedding

This accidental magic captures how I feel with you. Photo: Sweetheart Empire (Kate O’Connor)

For our fourth Anniversary, aside from the silk/satin motif (silk screened pregnancy announcement tees, and silk pajamas), Allia made us a wedding video. Watching it takes me back to exactly how I felt in those moments. It perfectly encapsulates the magic of our day.

Why do I care about that? Partly because it feels momentous and nostalgic to look back at happiness that still feels tangible and vivid, partly because there are people who told me this would never happen.

Allia and Alison’s Wedding (for the video follow this link)

toronto-wedding-berkeley-church-wedding-portraits-wedding-party.jpg

Berkeley-Fieldhouse-Wedding-05.jpg

When I first came out, it was six years before gay marriage was legalized in Canada (2005). I was a teenager, but I remember one of my mom’s friends saying, sympathetically, ‘It’s so sad that Alison won’t have a wedding and you’ll never have grandkids.’ Politely, my mom replied, ‘Fuck that.’

Not quite in those words, but with the same rebellious denial of that assumption. I am my mother’s daughter (and my father’s) and neither raised me to believe that anything I truly wanted was out of reach. They are the biggest advocates, even before I came out, they raised me to see every possibility and to feel entitled to happiness, love and acceptance. Maybe this is why I work so fiercely, at work and at play, to try to make others believe that we all deserve love, dignity and acceptance.

When people asked questions like, “will you ever get married?” “which one of you will wear a suit?” “so, you don’t want to ever have kids?” or made statements like “that must have been so hard for your parents” – I responded to it as a challenge.

We had exactly the wedding I envisioned, a reflection of our relationship, two people – full of laughter, dancing, old traditions and quirky, personal touches. I come from a theatre background and although I wasn’t a Disney princess sort of little girl, it never occurred to me that I couldn’t have a dreamy wedding fit for a fairytale. We themed it like a performance, a show, a circus, with several acts and lots of spectacle. It was a romance and a comedy. And I have never felt more at ease, so relaxed and so happy, in front of my loved ones, looking into the eyes of the woman I love.

I hope we can raise a little one who feels that swell of love and support, and will see that look in our eyes, four years, ten, twenty… fifty years from now.

Happy anniversary, my love. Cheers to many, many more.

 

Ring it in: 2018

Indulge

I love nostalgia. Capturing the moment. Journaling. This site has become sort of a living version of this. I was gifted a supremely awesome new book for 2018: it’s a 5 year journal with a small space for each day of the year, where you can add to each ‘same day’ for the next 5 years in a row. Five years stacked on top of each other with gilded pages; you can scan back and compare at a glance how you were doing on each day. I’m very excited to crack the spine.  Blogger, Danielle at verderamade.com just did a really lovely post about journals, methods and content; check it out!

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I started the Style Sa Vie site years ago to indulge my own creativity: I used to draw a picture of my outfit every day in high school, then technology came along and made it so much easier to bring that into sharp focus. Like choosing my clothes, I don’t write this for other people, that’s not why I started. But here, and on my other blog, where I chronicle my fertility journey with my wife, I get so much back from the kind emails, comments and encouragement of an online community. I sometimes wonder why I do this still. I’m not going to be an Alexa Chung or Aimee Song. But that was never the point. I have a life and a job that I love, and I have a hunch that I will like looking back at a snapshot of what life has been like, whether it’s the year in review, or a decade from now. Style Sa Vie is about the words: Style with a possessive adjective in front of Life. I want to own my life and curate it in a way that I find inspiring. A life of style. A style of living. Life that is mine.

In the spirit of hearkening back and looking ahead, a question: Do you believe in resolutions? For me this year will be about intention- being intentional. I want some guiding phrases, not edicts for a new year.

*Joy – be more joyful, rather than shredding joy with the tools of perfectionism, anxiety or guardedness. I am pretty comfortable with living and embracing vulnerability, but I can definitely get mired down, perseverating on things that just aren’t important. I’m going to Marie Kondo my attitude; does it spark joy? No? Then heave-ho!

*Let Go – This time of the physical stuff: of clutter, of things that no longer serve me. But also the metaphysical stuff: of the idea of perfect, or fears like ‘missing out,’ things taking too long to accomplish, or wondering what the next year will hold. Also, I’m getting rid of the self-judgement. I don’t judge the people I love; why do I do it to myself? I love me. But I should do it better.

*Start Now – this is the moment. Don’t wait for a ‘good time,’ or the ‘right’ time. If I see a repair in the house, go get the tools. If I think about a friend, call that person when it pops into your head. If I want something, what will I do to get it?

* Keep indulging and seeking new experiences. Don’t be complacent. If what I want is to savour a new taste and have another glass of wine. I will. If what I want is to get back to the Ballet Barre… I will do that, too. Also, Be creative. Remember how lucky I am. Celebrate my relationships. Take a deep breath. Don’t be frugal with your love and affection.

*Invest in people who invest in you. And invest in yourself!

*Create routines, but only if they help you reach these goals. I did 365 days of Outfits of the Day last year (which you can find in the style heading), so I can definitely do more mindful writing. Starting today: Journalling.

See you on the other side,

The Style Sa Vie