Baby is Here! Bring on the Winter Coats and Layers

style

Let’s be honest; I had no idea how motherhood would impact my fashion choices… but it’s fair to say that unless we are expecting company (10 days into our journey with a newborn) I’m wearing the same thing he’s wearing: a diaper and no top.

So, here is a roundup of my favourite layering pieces for fall and the transition into winter!

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The teddybear coat is definitely on trend, but I picked up one from Chance and Fate that is long and cozy, with just the right amount of cuddle. This color gray stands out from the rest of the sherpa coats we’re seeing this season. Mine is pretty much identical to the one pictured below:
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Plaid Print Blazer $148 . OAK + FORT … not the warmest, but the plaid layer is still going strong! Alternately, try this beauty…

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Soho Boy-Fit Blazer  $126 OLIVE

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A classic utility jacket is the perfect layering piece for lighter chills and it has all the pockets a no-handbag wearing new-mom could ask for.
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I have an amaaaazing coat similar to this, which I got at a clothing swap for freeeeee. It’s still a go-to! I am also a fan of layering my easy leopard print blazer over plain black to take the ‘lounging at home’ look to a slightly elevated, ready-for-visitors level.
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H&M Down Jacket ($199) Last but not least, I invested this season in a puffer coat; try this one in charcoal, or (like I did) try the H&M army green calf-length version for maximum protection from the elements. I love how airy-light it is, while also being roomy enough to zip baby into the front while he is in a carrier.
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LOGG olive green long parka H&M
Speaking of baby, here is our little fox. Thanks for bearing with me while I make this transition into the busiest, craziest job I’ve ever had. xo
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Why you can’t be ‘racist’ towards a white person

Open Letters

Trigger Warning: this post deals with identity politics and might raise some hackles if you have strong feelings about race, privilege and power. I invite you to read with an open mind. These views represent what I have come to understand, as a person who studied Equity and Diversity in university and has spent the last decade, plus, trying to be a better, more informed ally to those who experience marginalization.

A friend asked recently: What’s a topic you’d love to deep dive into with a group of people that you rarely have time / energy to “go there” with?

I answered: why you can’t be ‘racist’ towards white people. In recent weeks, I had tried explaining this to a 15 year old boy and got very little traction.

My big question for this young, white boy was ‘what do you gain by being ‘right’ about this? Do you benefit somehow by maintaining that people can, in fact, be racist towards you? This claim of ‘reverse racism’ seems to soothe our ideas about equality – people can be ‘mean to us’ too, after all. But is this effort to establish that white people can be treated as badly as others have been treated by white people missing the point? Arguably, no person or group will ever be able to top white people’s treatment of … any minority.

A friend of a friend very sweetly and sincerely asked for my thoughts on this issue. She wrote, “Hi, we don’t know each other and have the lovely E as a mutual friend but I’m curious – why can’t someone be ‘racist’ toward a white person? I’d have thought that racism doesn’t know ‘colour’. Is racism racist? I think intolerance of one race against another race would qualify as racism, regardless. But maybe I misunderstood!”

Here is my best effort to succinctly unpack the question and offer some answers:

 A simple definition of racism is about someone treating another person poorly (or worse) because of bias/prejudice based on one’s race.

But racISM is about power and power is systemic. There has never been a time when white people were disenfranchised or without systemic power (even if they are the only white person in the room). Peggy McIntosh wrote a very effective essay and list of questions you can ask yourself, which can help to put this into perspective: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack of White Privilege. 

So, while someone can be prejudiced or treat someone in a way that discriminates against a white person based on their racial bias, there will never be/has never been a time when those attitudes were also supported by systems of power that allowed another group to use those avenues to oppress white people based on that aspect of their identity. That doesn’t mean there aren’t disenfranchised white people, or people of colour who have power, etc. But generally, the ability to wield power in conjunction with bias and prejudice about race leads to Racism (capital R).

So, while I might sense or know for sure that someone has treated me with prejudice or inequality based on my ‘whiteness’ I don’t stand to lose my housing, be shot by police, be prevented from moving freely and safely, be taken off a voter list (as is currently happening in Georgia), be denied job opportunities, be followed by security in a store, have speculations about me being a _____________ (insert racial stereotype). To equate whatever prejudice I might experience with the centuries-long murder, enslavement, oppression and pervasive inequality experienced by other races would trivialize the real, lived experiences of minorities (largely perpetrated by colonizing white nations and the legacy of these institutions).

Long answer, but hopefully makes sense. It’s hard sometimes to square this with the definition of racism as just ‘treating some X, based on race’ but equating the treatment of any minority with a white person’s limited experience with racial bias obscures a lot of the history and pervasive, lasting impacts of colonization and racialized violence.

When we cling to the simple definition of racism, one we might use to explain this idea to … elementary students, we overlook the nuances of this issue which isn’t black and white. Even if, on the surface it is about colour, it’s also about… power, access to power and legacies of inequality … of power.  I’m hoping that by looking at those grey areas we can stop holding onto our privilege (to claim we are also experiencing racism), while simultaneously not acknowledging that we have privilege. This doesn’t suggest that we can’t be made to feel bad, be treated badly, or be lumped into a category with every other potato-hued person… which can feel pretty shitty. But that feeling is not comparable to the suffering experienced and real fear visited on people who are not white, now and through history.

Thanks for this question! I’m always still learning and really appreciate exploring this topic, as well as input from others who know more than I do/ can offer insight.  Please feel free to offer you ideas, questions, insights, etc., nicely and politely. I am, after all, Canadian and while really being a fan of diversity, I’m also a huge fan of civility. Thank you!

39 weeks

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OOTD – while the due date approaches,… it has been a tough few days. I’ve been having some anxiety. Bad dreams. But pushing through.

I’m dressing like Phoebe from the 90s. Vintage patterned dress, oversized cardigan and knee high socks. Black silky top with bold silver statement necklace from Shannon Passero. Throw on a muppet-inspired navy faux fur coat from Zara for the eve of legalization party at The Drake. Spend a cozy day in a classic sweater dress in camel and navy stripes.

Week 38 Bump OOTD

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Still rolling along with little one on slow cook. Fall temperatures have brought some relief, but Summer seems to be making a comeback with some warm and sunny weather. This far along, dresses are my best friend.

Lots of dresses in my life, from top left, Anthropologie navy with white dots, Winners red and black mod flowers, psychedelic silky tunic from a clothing swap, and an oversized black and white spotted Zara dress shirt with peplum. All worn with some variation of black leggings and boots or jeans and boots. Never skip a chance to wear your res lipstick (if you’re into that sort of thing).

Country Showers Bring Sweet … Horses!

Indulge

Ever since I was little girl, I’ve had an obsession with horses and ponies. When a friend of mine, who just happens to live on an equestrian farm, offered to host a baby shower for us it didn’t actually occurred to me what that meant: horses would be part of our fall shower!

Thank you, Shan, for the most warm and loving day of celebration. I’m grateful – always.

Turns out that my shower dress matches our nursery! It was a short drive out to the country – for cake, food, great friends and an autumn walk around the farm.