Out and Proud

Saw a lovely post from a teacher who speaks about coming out, after marrying her wife.

He roost reminded me why I came out and keep coming out each year, each semester, in each new class. Being out in my classroom is one of the most valuable lessons and teachable moments I have to offer. It shows closeted kids or those with queer family that it’s possible to live a beautiful, rich and happy life; to be a professional; to be respected and successful as a queer person.

What else motivates me to be out in my classroom? It provides visibility and hope to kids and a learning opportunity about the diversity within our community. So many important steps towards inclusion and acceptance begin with the risk of being seen. For many it is about knowing someone and having that relationship spark the curiosity to question what we have learned or previously taken as truth. It’s hard to bear hatred or intolerance when you have a face to put to the name, whatever the marginalized group or person may be. I am their teacher. Someone they know and care about. Someone who has modelled caring and for respect for all the things that make them who they are. I actively teach anti-oppression and critical thinking about diversity, myth-busting the rhetoric that too frequently is used to promote intolerance.

If it’s safe to do so… come on out. Our kids need to see you there.

Put a Ring On It – But Keep Your Mouth Shut About Other People’s Rings

Wedding

Even though I’m already married and the ‘ring search’ is far behind me, I still love looking at engagement rings and seeing what is new and exciting in that world. On a blog I was reading recently a woman posted the following:

“I see so many posts about moissanite and never realized it’s as popular as it is. I was under the impression it was a relatively new creation. I have had several people ask me if my diamond ring is “real” and I have to admit that it bothers me. Also, how do you even respond to that? Anyway, I am looking forward to reading other points of view.”

My thoughts:

I think my perspective is definitely shaped by the fact that I do not care about other people’s opinions about my ring and I also don’t have friends who would ever judge my relationship (or my financial status) based on the ring I’m wearing. When planning our wedding with my spouse we decided, deliberately, that we did not want expensive or ostentatious rings. What we did want were one of a kind, unconventional and unique rings that suited our style and our lifestyle. I work with my hands and would be nervous to wear something too precious. Not that I didn’t try on a variety of rings… but every time I tried a stunner with a gem that was raised too far from my finger, I felt like I’d get it caught on things, destroy it and every surface in my house, but mostly …like it was totally impractical.

In the end, my ring was made by a friend who is a jeweller; it’s unconventional and we used rough diamonds, so no sparkle really. No one has ever asked if they are ‘real’. However, many people have asked about the ring, the design and where they can contact the creator (Breanne Morrow at White Feather Designs).

View More: http://sweetheartempire.pass.us/alison-allia-engagement

Photo by Sweetheart Empire. Rings by White Feather Designs

Engagement photos by Kate O’Connor of Sweetheart Empire

I think what bothers me about the idea of people asking the original poster these questions is this: why are they asking? Is there some further question they need to have answered? Why do they care?

Maybe they are a gemologist? Maybe they are looking for an engagement ring. But if it’s because they want to know how costly the ring is… why? It’s none of their business and it’s super tacky that they are asking.

Perhaps they want to know because they are considering their options, or maybe see the value in a ring that doesn’t support an industry that has some problems (conflict diamonds, environmental impact), but you can probably already tell that this is their view based on the way they ask.

At the end of the day, I don’t know why it’s anyone’s business what you choose for something as personal as your wedding/engagement rings.

My little bro is getting hitched.

Wedding

This is the happy couple.

That means it’s party time. And time for an amazing outfit that is comfortable and stylin’. My wife and I are emceeing. Here is the head to toe inspiration.

Top from Anthropologie:
Skirt from Adrianna Papell.

Some tips: get a top you will wear again (casual to dressy), invest in a statement piece – a voluminous skirt that can transform and pair well in the future for events. For makeup, my kickass former student, pro-artist Kyle McKellar, is giving me a stellar look. And I’m doing a trade for my hair, from a hair student, for wine (of all things). This is via BUNZ trading zone – like Kijijii but all for bartering.

Stay tuned for the real deal reveal.

Bridal Shower Inspiration – OOTD

style, Wedding

My brother is getting married. And I couldn’t be more thrilled. Seriously. The woman he is marrying is a dream come true (for him, I have no doubt, but also for me). She is down to earth, charming, sweet, funny, adventurous, independent, courageous and kind. Plus she’s a babe and he is so lucky to have found his match.

This weekend, as per tradition, my aunties are hosting a shower for her – a chance for the family to get to know her and for many of us to meet her sisters, mother and maids of honour.

A winter shower (in Canada) presents some challenges, especially in a home-hosted shower where we take our shoes off (politely, as Canadians are rumoured to be).

I got some inspiration by scouring the Paris fashion week street style:

Now, these might seem unlikely, but bear with me. A fancy skirt, paired with an interesting, embellished top and lots of texture, an opaque black stocking and cute clutch. I think I’ve got it.

Stay tuned for upcoming tips on whimsical wedding style, party favours, best dresses, hair and makeup and personalized touches. I’ve also got my eye on some dreamy wedding photography style. What’s your go to look for daytime parties?

A Kiss Is On My List – dream wedding inspiration

Wedding

  From the dress to the table settings and flowers, these images might inspire you to consider the pretty details that can make the memories look like magic.

Wedded Bliss – Dream Wedding Dresses, Destinations and Details

Wedding

Beautiful love stories come in all shapes and sizes.

A Sitdown with Wedding Photographer, Kate O’Connor of Sweetheart Empire

Love, style, Wedding

Just a week after my own article, about how wonderful it was to work with Kate O’Connor, a fabulous photographer, for our wedding images, the venue where we were married (Berkeley Church) contacted Kate to interview her; they also asked to feature our photos on their own blog.

They asked:

When approaching this lovely Berkeley Church wedding what were your considerations and aspirations?

I have three goals for every wedding:

To see my subjects for who they truly are – loving, amazing humans taking a leap of faith;
To make sure they feel comfortable, so that they can be themselves and enjoy themselves;
To capture the wedding day FEELS with love and realness – both how people are feeling (emotionally), and the atmosphere of the day overall.

I wanted the brides and their folks to look back at the images and remember how it felt that day – the anticipation, the emotions, and of course the immense loving energy that happens when you are in a room surrounded by your loved ones. berkeley-church-toronto-wedding-ceremoney-weddin-alter.jpg

For the whole article, follow the link here.

Wedding Bells: Getting Ready In Style

Wedding

I love love. I especially love nostalgia, photographs and reminiscing about happy life moments. So, it`s been a total treat looking at the proofs from Sweetheart Empire; our photographer, Kate O`Connor is a total pro and caught all the lovey-dovey moments of our nuptials, making it a day of smooth sailing and laughter. Here`s a little taste of our day: my wife, getting ready to put on the dress and meet me at the church, surrounded by her dearest friends.

View More: http://sweetheartempire.pass.us/allia-alison-wedding

Dress, shoes and grandmother`s vintage fur. Jewels, makeup and finishing touches. We jumped on the trend, right before it peaked two years ago, and ordered long kaftans in an array of bright hues for all our bridesmaids, mum, our musicians and all the friends who pitched in to make our DIY wedding so dreamy.

Our Emcees were one of our favourite couples, a spicey pair of lesbian-marrieds who are just as silly as we are. In the Grand Hotel, she prepped, went over the itinerary, sipped champagne and got prepped with her ladies. Don`t let the serious face, above, fool you; she was cool as a cucumber, no Bridezilla to be found.

With her sister to help zip her in, it was high-fives and hugs. What a stunning bride. And down the hall, I`m in my own blissful bubble, getting ready to see this gorgeous face at the altar. Stay tuned for the next love-update! Cheers and love, A.

View More: http://sweetheartempire.pass.us/allia-alison-wedding

Santorini Destination Wedding

Wedding

Greece was on my bucket list. We even talked of taking our honeymoon in Greece. We couldn’t afford it. So, when my good friend, a sommelier and traveller, decided to get married in Santorini, we couldn’t believe our luck. I was asked to do the bride’s hair and make-up and to do make-up for the wedding party. Of course, I said yes.

What an incredibly magical spot to wed!

The Bride’s closest friends, family and her new step-daughter!

Getting ready with her bridal party.

Enjoying the bridal suite at the El Greco in Santorini (Fira), Greece

I brought my favourite products for the big day – tried and true – ready for the heat!

Meanwhile, outside the day was shaping up to be incredibly idyllic. El Greco Resort, Santorini.

At the wedding venue, Oceanides, with my lovely wife. Just a little over a year ago, we married in Toronto, Ontario.

Delicious food and fresh local ingredients.

Honey, sesame and cheese…

By the time the ‘main’ course of whole grilled fish came to our table, we were so satisfied and full!

Plates for breaking. Opa!

The bride’s hair and some behind the scenes NON-professional close-ups.

The bride.

Braids and twists were the inspiration for this Grecian look. Heat-proof hair was on the ‘must have’ list.

At the venue, the sea took center stage as the gorgeous backdrop for their vows.

Our friendship goes back to 7th grade. She looked absolutely stunning, head to toe.

A rose between two thorns.

The day after the wedding; the bride, Lindsay, was ready to relax on the beach. Tunic/beach coverup from Muska - Thira, Santorini.

The day after the wedding; the bride, Lindsay, was ready to relax on the beach. If only we all looked this fresh the day after ‘the big day’! Beach cover-up from Muska – Thira, Santorini.